Mitsubishi van in Wheat Thins ad commercial

Ippuku Berkeley restaurant review

This is me at Ippuku last night:

My favorites last night were the tempura bitter melon and the minced chicken on a skewer.  For a spot-on review, check out Rich C.'s review here.

Chifa Peruano San Francisco restaurant review

Ed.: This is Part 1 of a two-part series of reviews of Chinese-Peruvian restaurants in America.  Stay tuned for a review of Red Egg, a Peruvian dim sum joint in New York's Chinatown.

Asians In South America
That there are thousands of Chinese restaurants, or chifas, in Peru should not be surprising.  South America is just as much a continent of immigrants as North America is.  There is a statue of Chiang Kai-Shek in Paraguay (anti-Communist generalissimos tend to stick together).  Carlos Menem, the Ferrari-driving Argentinean president, is of Syrian descent.  Almost half of the population of Guyana is East Indian.

After the abolition of slavery in the 19th century, over 100,000 Chinese coolies went to Peru.  Most worked on coastal plantations or dug guano (bird shit).  Many chose Peru because the United States barred Chinese immigrants after the Gold Rush.  Whenever there was economic or social turmoil for Chinese people (whether they lived in Macau, China, Hong Kong, Taiwan, or Indonesia), they moved to Peru, even as recently as the 1990s.

The word chifa is derived from "chi fan", which means "to eat food" in Mandarin.  I thought I'd never eat at one unless I went to Peru.  After a long search on the net, I found one in the Outer Mission District (Mission and Geneva) in San Francisco.

Chifa Peruano In San Francisco
It's called Chifa Peruano Asian Restaurant.  The neighborhood is definitely working class, but not rough at all.  Next door to the right is a huge pool hall.  To the left is a party store that specializes in cakes for quinceaneras.

Despite my description below, you have to go there.  You will have a great meal.  You will have a good time.

The front glass door has a poster for a celebration of Peruvian independence day.  As I enter, I notice that this is the prototypical cheap Chinese eatery.  Everything about the decor is dated and kitsch.

The restaurant's floor plan is L shaped.  The bottom, horizontal part of the L is a small banquet room with a long table.  The main dining room takes up the bottom 3/4 of the vertical part of the L.  The top 1/4 of the vertical part of the L contains a round table where the Chinese staff eats and converses in a mixture of Spanish and a Chinese dialect I am not familiar with.  They have their own little TV playing Chinese soaps.  The main dining room gets two flat screens showing a Peruvian satellite station.

We sit.  On the wall is a Chinese zodiac chart.  Unfortunately, it is in English.  But on the opposite wall is a Chinese painting with the obligatory accompanying calligraphy.  Next to the painting is a Quechuan tapestry showing two Andean women, no doubt made of vicuna or lama hair (maybe).  Now that's more like it.

Before we look at the trilingual menu/paper place mat, we are served small cups of soup.  It's vegetable broth with mystery ground meat (I think it's pork).  And it's delicious.  The kind lady asks what we would like to drink.  Inca Kola, of course.

We definitely had to order lomo saltado, the national dish of Peru.  It's a mix of French fry-cut potatoes, beef, onions, and tomatoes.  We get a bucket of steamed rice.  I asked our server what Chinese dish do Peruvians like the most.  She pointed to #68, Chijokay.  Okay, chijokay it is then.

We wait patiently.  There is so much to take in.  The old Chinese men speaking Spanish.  The young Peruvian family ordering take out.  The ad on TV for Wong hypermarkets, the WalMart of Peru.

Lomo Saltado
The lomo saltado arrives first.  It was clearly cooked in a wok.  I'm going to compare it to my favorite version, as prepared by El Chalan in El Sobrante.  The potatoes are wetter and not as crispy as the El Chalan version.  And instead of school chalk shaped and sized slices of steak, the beef in the Chifa version is cut the way you'd find in all of the restaurant's other Chinese beef entrees-- thin and oblong shaped.  There was a lot more garlic here but hardly any tomatoes.  Not surprisingly, it tasted like lomo saltado prepared by a Chinese guy in a Chinese restaurant.  My enjoyment of the dish was attributed to 75% taste/flavor, 25% novelty.

Chijokay
I have no idea what I ordered.  What arrived was a significant piece of chicken.  There were no bones but just enough soft cartilage and tendon to add flavor.  It's cut and served the same way as roasted duck-- in 1/2" slices.  What set this dish apart was that it was quickly deep fried with a thin smattering of breading.  And just before it is served, they pour a thin coat of sauce.  I know that "sauce" sounds pretty generic.  That's because I don't know what it's made of.  A search on Peruvian recipe websites, with the help of Babelfish, reveals that the sauce is made of scallops(?!).  Do they mean oyster sauce?  Whatever it was, it has the distinct, umami flavor of MSG.  The chicken was, inevitably, both curious and delicious.

The ingredients were not fresh.  The presentation was tired.  And the effort was lackluster.  But I had a ball.  The people were friendly and helpful.  Everything about the place was honest and sincere.  The sheer cultural value is priceless.  If you're ever driving on 280 and need a meal break, get off on Geneva and chi fan.

Addicted to Queen of Sheba loose leaf tea

A couple of weeks ago, I had dinner at Yemeni's Restaurant in the Tenderloin.  After a great meal, I walked across the street to Queen of Sheba market.  It's a Middle Eastern market and I was hoping to find some odd snacks with Arabic script on the packaging.  I ended up with a medium-sized container of home packaged tea for $4.50.

It's like crack.  I've been drinking it non-stop over the 4th of July weekend.  When I had tea out of a tea bag at work this morning, it literally tasted and smelled like garbage.  I couldn't drink it.  At all.

Bourdain Medium Raw book review

I just finished Tony Bourdain's latest book.  It was a fun read, but nowhere nearly as visceral as Kitchen Confidential.  If you don't have the time to read it, I suggest going to your local library or book store and reading Chapter 18, My Aim Is True.  It follows, from beginning to end, Justo Thomas's shift.  This Dominican immigrant is the fish butcher at New York's Le Bernardin.  In a five hour shift, this machine cuts 700 pounds of ultra-high grade fish.  When he goes on vacation, three people do his work.  It's an amazing play-by-play account.  The chapter ends with Thomas eating at Le Bernardin for the first time in his many-year career there.

Sauber BMW Ferrari Pedro de la Rosa Paella Valencia

What's up with Pedro and food?  First, he snagged Burger King Spain's sponsorship.  Now, this.

Via Sweet F1.

Hamburger Helper Nascar ad commercial

This was my specialty in my early 20s.

Maple bacon lollipop sucker taste test review

I had to get this when I saw it at the store.

The ingredients are sugar, rice syrup, bacon bits, salt, natural smoke flavor, natural bacon flavor, natural maple flavor.

Here is the unveil.

Yup, those are bacon bits in there.  The first flavor you taste is sweet maple.  Then there's definitely bacon flavor, but it is overwhelmed by the sweet maple again.  It's actually not bad.  My only complaint is the bits of suspended bacon that end up in your mouth.  Kind of gross, if you think about it.

Anthony Bourdain's favorite car is...

...Checker Marathon.

What is Anthony Bourdain's favorite car?

Writer-chef-TV personality Anthony Bourdain will be signing books at Book Passage in the Ferry Building tomorrow at 10 am.  Barring a riot or fainting while waiting in line, I'll let you know what his favorite car is.  Because, hey, isn't that the first and only question you would ask him?

Answer here.

Bon Appetit 2010 food trends

Did this guy get his ideas by stepping into a time machine and going BACK in time?  Banh mi?  Sriracha? Comfort desserts?!

I just received a sneak peek of their 2011 food trend list: Wine coolers.  Fondue.  Frozen yogurt.

Burger King with Sauber's Kamui Kobayashi and Pedro de la Rosa

My first real Mongolian meal: So bad, it's good (Asian Grill Oakland review)

I have always been fascinated with Mongolian culture and history.  In middle school, I would ride my bike to the local university library and read all the books about Genghis and Kublai Khan.  But to this day, I have yet to visit Mongolia.  And despite the proliferation of Mongolian BBQ places in America (which is seeing a revival of sorts since its brief popularity in the 1980s), I have never eaten an authentic Mongolian meal.

As customers of cheap pizza delivery places in and around Oakland may have noticed, the majority of the employees are Mongolian.  Apparently, most of the Mongolians in America live within a few square blocks nestled between downtown Oakland and Lake Merritt.  This has prompted the opening of two Mongolian restaurants for the expat community-- Pizzarama (regular pizza place plus Mongolian) (now closed) and Asian Grill (sushi and American breakfast plus Mongolian) (still in business).  By default, I tried Asian Grill (352 14th Street).

Asian Grill is the type of ethnic restaurant you never notice when you drive through a semi-gritty neighborhood.  They are in plain sight, but you look past them.

I enter and realize I am the only customer there.  During my meal, only two other people come in, but they are Mongolians who are there just to hang out.  I assume it has become an unofficial lounge/community center for them.  I don't think the two ever ordered anything.

From a cursory visual inspection, it is my opinion that sushi may not be the place's forte.  This didn't stop the waiter from handing me the sushi menu.  After a few minutes, I flag my man down and ask for the Mongolian menu.

I wouldn't say my table was spotless.  The remnants of the last customers' meals were still on it.  Without being culturally condescending or an apologist, I imagined myself in a rough and tumble caravanserai in the middle of the Gobi.  Would I complain about crumbs on my table there?  No.

My waiter takes forever to reappear and take my order.  Is this the result of his Communist-era upbringing? Was he busy in the back?  Or was this just poor service?  I ask for the "steemed" (sic) buuz, which is a steamed dumpling similar to xiaolongbao.  My waiter tells me it will take ten minutes.  I said forget it, I don't have enough time on the parking meter.  I opt instead for the meat pancakes (2 for $3) and Gulyash (goulash) stew ($7.95ish).  Oh, and a salt milk tea.

Living on the frigid steppes with little agriculture and lots of livestock means that the Mongolian diet is very different from what we are used to.  Meat, especially fatty meat, is desirable.  So is salt.  And lots of dairy.  Vegetables, not so much.

The salt milk tea was an experience.  The strongest flavor was beef stock, like bullion cubes in hot water.  The second strongest flavor was milk or cream.  Then, a hint of tea.  I quickly got used to it and enjoyed it after a couple of sips.  After a few bites of my salty meal, I took a sip of the tea and its saltiness disappeared.

The meat pie (khuushuur) was next.  It was scaldingly hot and greasy.  The doughy shell was chewy and the meat filling was cement gray.  But it tasted okay.  It's definitely a huge departure from the much crispier and lighter Mongolian meat pies that I'm used to from the Chinese chain Little Sheep Mongolian Hot Pot (in Union City and San Mateo).

The goulash entree was a bit disappointing.  There was an ice cream scoop-ful of stale steamed rice.  There was the cabbage salad which was just mediocre cole slaw.  The mashed potato turned out to be a baked potato that had been mashed with a plastic spork.  The stew itself tasted like it came out of a Dinty Moore can.

It all sounds like a below average meal.  But I'm definitely going to go back.  Why?  Perhaps it's because it is the only authentic Mongolian restaurant in the entire Western Hemisphere.  I want to try everything on the menu because I don't foresee myself going to Mongolia in the near future.  Plus, I think Mongolian cuisine in general is just not that exciting and this meal I had was as good as it got.  Maybe having mediocre food is part of being Mongolian.

Preview of Andrew Zimmern in Mongolia (and other places)

Veggie cheese omelet MRE review

I bought an omelet MRE at the local military surplus store.  I wanted to test it out to see if I can stand eating this for two weeks straight after The Big One (earthquake) finally hits California.  It cost $7.

First, I don't think what I got is exactly what American soldiers eat.  I've seen military MREs sold on Ebay and they are not packaged like this.  The bag I got was thick and bulky.

I opened the bag and it came with all of this.  Going sort of clockwise from the top left, we have the MRE heater, a spoon, the hot beverage bag, matches (green), napkins (below matches), moist towelette, crackers, blackberry jam, spiced cider, shredded potatoes with bacon, two pieces of gum, Tabasco (woth all of its content leaked/evaporated already), beverage base- raspberry, salt, egg omelet with vegetables and cheese, cinnamon scone, and toaster pastry.  That's a lot of packaging for just one meal.  Thank goodness I didn't eat this on Earth Day.

Here are the pastries.  The crackers and jam were fine.  The crackers were huge.  The toaster pastry is essentially a Pop Tart, and that tasted normal too.  The cinnamon scone was surprisingly decent.  It was a bit chalky and you had to ignore the indentation left by the desiccation packet.  I've certainly had worse pastries from Safeway.

Now on to the main course.  The MRE heater generated a lot of heat, but not much of it was transferred onto the two packets (omelet and potatoes).  I suspect it's because all other MREs only contain one packet of food to heat instead of two.  I had to re-heat my food in the microwave to make it a little more palatable.  I also added my own Tabasco and ketchup.  This is what the entree looked like, pre-sauced.

The omelet is the orange blob on the top of the picture.

Are you grossed out yet?  The omelet had the consistency of a snorkel mouthguard.  The only taste was a hint of processed American cheese.  I did not taste eggs or "veggies".  The potatoes were edible.  They tasted wet.

I don't think I am going to put MREs in my earthquake emergency kit.

Eat at KFC, fight breast cancer, get clogged arteries

Cheeseburger in a can

I came across this while looking for food for my emergency kit.  Apparently, it's only sold in Germany.  If anyone can tell me where I can buy this in America, I would appreciate it.  I want to try it.

Meals Ready to Eat MREs

I'm putting together a home emergency survival kit and just put a bid on ebay on a case of 12 MREs.  Apparently, every year, there are 24 different entrees that are put out.  I got Case A, which means I'll be enjoying entrees 1 through 12.  I will "cook" them and post pictures once they arrive.

In the mean time, here are a couple of clips of MREs.  On the second video, you gotta see the chili verde.  I hope my case comes with the cheese and vegetable omelet, which is supposedly the worst of the worst.

I have even more respect for our soldiers now.

100% "GM"-free Saab

Credit.

Casa Sanchez tattoo free burritos

That I love Casa Sanchez products cannot be denied.  But would I ever tattoo the restaurant's logo in exchange for a lifetime's worth of free burritos for lunch?

Hold on, I'm still thinking...

1999 SF Chronicle story here.
2010 WSJ updated story here.

Currywurst history and restaurant

I'm about to try German currywurst for the first time and I'm stoked.  The combo of sausage, ketchup, and curry powder sounds as intriguing and delicious as Hawaiian loco moco (burger patty, brown gravy, fried egg on top of rice) or Quebecois poutine (French fries topped with cheese curds and brown gravy).

Here is a primer on currywurst:

Here is Curry Queen in Hamburg, which would fit right in on 4th Street in Berkeley:

Photo credit.