Obama (Bud Light): Obama can't be elitist so all microbrews and foreign beers are out. I assume he's health conscious so he wants something that's less filling and tastes great. Except Bud Light does not taste great.
Professor Gates (Red Stripe): I kinda understand why he chose a Jamaican beer. But ultimately, Red Stripe is owned by some faceless British conglomerate. Plus, it tastes like piss. How about a domestic beer from a minority-owned/operated microbrewery instead?
Sgt. Crowley (Blue Moon): Although I've never tried this pseudo-microbrew owned by Coors, I've heard good things about it. In this three-way beer competition, I declare Sgt. Crowley the winner.
Although unintentional, what are the chances that Gates and Crowley picked beers with colors in their names?
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